Gesundheit!
by blossom2013
Summary: There's nothing in the world worse than getting the flu - it comes with the whole dreadful package: the fatigue, sneezing, congestion, coughing, fever... What a nightmare! But imagine catching it the night before your band's opening concert! What will happen when Brittany and Alvin fall victim to a merciless case of the influenza? co-write with BlytheHasF reckles
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **We do _not_ own Alvin&chipmunks

Tuesday, January 14th, 1992

* * *

As many fan fictions begin, it's morning in the Seville house, which means that once again, Alvin was the last one out of bed. It was a Tuesday and Simon was in charge of waking him up. This would be an exceptionally difficult task because not only was Alvin nearly impossible to wake up, but it was also wintertime, which meant that Alvin's habits of going back to sleep after being woken up were highly anticipated. Simon hated waking duty more than any other chore - Alvin never stays awake during winter. Wintertime hibernation was the most prominent instinct the eldest chipmunk had, it would seem.

"Exactly how I want to spend my Tuesday morning," grumbled the blue-clad chipmunk, "waking up the sloth."

Simon approached the bed of his slumbering older brother, standing over him with arms tightly crossed over his chest. With the full knowledge of his brother's recalcitrant sleeping habits, Simon began brainstorming the ideas of how he could creatively wake his sleeping brother this time; Maybe he could roll him out of bed? No, he'd done that too many times already. Perhaps a cold bucket of water? Nah, too messy. What about hitting him with a pillow repeatedly? ….ah, what the heck! He wouldn't wake up to that...!

After another moment of going over his options, Simon had finally fished out an idea.

Without any more deliberating, he began removing articles of Alvin's bed. First came the comforter, which was draped unevenly over the sleeping chipmunk's shoulders and hanging sloppily over the sides of his mattress. Next came the linen bedsheet underneath the comforter, then Alvin's goosefeather pillow.

"Rise and shine, Alvin. You wouldn't want to be late for school, would you?"

Alvin remained motionless, seemingly unafflicted by the sudden absence of sheets and cushions. Simon kept trying, removing the layering of bedsheets underneath Alvin's unconscious body. He stopped when the bed was entirely bare, removing Alvin's shirt as a last resort. No luck. By then, Simon was clenching his fists at his sides, notably vexed.

"Alvin!" he bellowed, "Wake up! Alvin!"

No use; Alvin was out like a light. This meant that Simon would have to try a different approach - one that never usually works: a verbal trigger.

Normally, this approach never worked on the eldest chipmunk. But seeing as no other force on Earth seemed to work on Alvin, Simon figured there's nothing wrong with a little experimentation so early in the morning.

"I burned your guitar," said Simon as he leaned close to the sleeping chipmunk's ear. Alvin stirred, mumbling something incoherantly in his sleep. The fact that Simon was getting a response was a very good sign. He tried again.

"There are camera people outside the house right now waiting to interview you."

Alvin's eyebrows shot up, accompanied by a sleepy grin and a mumble. He looked so goofy, it caused Simon to snicker a bit. Maybe this wasn't such a bad chore...

"Brittany Miller said she saw you in your underwear," said Simon, trying to hold back his amusement. Alvin shifted even more, his face twisting from his grin into a disturbed expression. Simon was enjoying himself.

"Theodore ate all of your clothes." Simon was now struggling to keep himself from laughing - Alvin was curled into the fetal position, his knees pressed tightly to his chest. This was too much. Simon supressed his laughter for just one more tease.

"...Dave said you can't perform at the concert tonight."

"WHAT?!"

Alvin startled forward in bed, accidentally colliding his forehead with Simon's.

"Ow! Simon!" Groaned Alvin, "What are you doing?"

"I was trying to wake you up," replied Simon, rubbing the new ache on his forehead, "which is practically impossible. However, it seems I have succeeded, so you're welcome."

"You couldn't have just shaken me or-" Alvin looked down, noticing the article of clothing that was missing, "...where's my shirt?"

* * *

"Well look who it is!" Laughed Dave, turning away from the stove for a moment to place a plate of freshly made hashbrowns in front of the drowsy chipmunk, "he has awakened!"

"Mhm...ughhh" groaned Alvin, less than pleased that he's away from the luxuries of sleep. He pushed his plate away to let it be devoured by his younger, green-clad brother. Something felt strangely out of place to Alvin. He felt unbalanced; achy and exhausted more than usual. He was no stranger to growing pains or sore muscles, but this was different - the chipmunk felt heavy, congested and woozy and found that he couldn't breathe through his nose. However, he tried not to be too bothered by any of it. Ignoring this strange new sensation, he placed his head on the table.

"Don't go back to sleep, silly!" laughed Theodore with a mouth full of hashbrowns, shaking his brother's arm, "wakey wakey!" Simon simply rolled his eyes, paying no mind to his brother's annoying tendencies to relapse into sleep mode at the kitchen table. It happened nearly every day in wintertime, so this wasn't anything new.

"Now Alvin," began Dave, "if you can't wake up, perhaps it would be a better idea to let you sleep instead of showing up at the concert tonight-"

"I'M AWAKE!" Exclaimed a wide-eyed Alvin, propping himself up stiffly, "I'm awake! I can do it!"

"Well, I'm glad," laughed Dave, "Now you'd better get dressed for school. I'm assuming you don't want to show up to glad in your pajamas, do you?"

Alvin shook his head, scooting carefully out of the kitchen booth and heading toward the main staircase to their upstairs bedroom. Ascending to the top of the stairs, Alvin disappeared into his bedroom and dressed himself for the day.

The other brothers continued soundly eating their breakfast until suddenly, they heard a sudden sneeze from upstairs:

"AAAACHOOOO!"

But that wasn't all; there were more. Many more.

"ACHOO! ACHOO! A-ACHOO! A! A! A! ACHOO!"

"Hey Alvin? You okay up there, buddy?" called a concerned Dave, taking a moment away from making an omelette to check up on his eldest son.

"Y-yeah... just eh...um...dust or something." replied Alvin in the midst of a yawn.

No sooner had Dave returned to the stove did the sneezing fit start up again.

"ACHOO! A! ACHOO! A-ACHOO!"

"Alvin?" called Dave again, "are you sure you're-"

Just then, Alvin came down the stairs, fully dressed in a double layers of red sweaters and a snowcoat along with snowgloves, a hat, and a wool scarf. If Alvin hadn't looked so serious, Dave wouldn've laughed; he looked like an eskimo.

"...Alvin...what are you wearing?"

The boy looked down at his coat and shrugged, "What? It's freezing in here!"

Dave swiftly stepped to the archway of the living room and checked the thermostat.

"It's 79 degrees fahrenheit."

"See? Freezing."

"No, Alvin. That's normal. In fact, that's warm," Dave crossed his arms and examined his son's pale complexion. Today, he wasn't his usual tan color. He looked gaunt and weak and his eyes were bloodshot, making way to several layers of skin under his bottom eyelashes.

"Are you sure you're feeling well? You know that if you're not healthy, I can't allow you to be in tonight's show."

"No, no! I'm ship-shape, Dave!" laughed Alvin nervously. The eldest chipmunk then slipped on his backpack and sat on the stairs, pulling on his snow boots.

* * *

"Simon, this time you're wrong!" declared Alvin confidently, "I'm certain that Jaws: the Revenge came on the same year as E.T. I'm sure of it!"

"And as I keep saying, you're wrong. E.T was made in 1982. Everyone knows that!" countered Simon, "Jaws: The Revenge was made in 1987."

The three chipmunk brothers were, for the third time this week, arguing about classic movies and box office hits after the week previous when they'd been debating with each other about classic rock groups. Of course, neither of them were ever able to settle an argument fair and square, so they would always ended up deciding on the philosophy of 'let's agree to disagree.'

These days, the boys weren't joined by the Chipettes since the girls were told to take the bus to school during winter. And since Theodore was always bullied on the schoolbus to school, they would walk instead: just the three of them - alone. Instead of continuing along the path to school silently, what better way to travel than to start debates on such topics as pop-culture? On the bright side, it sure took their minds off of their busy concert schedulings for that coming week. They would be on tour with the Chipettes for the next TWO weeks

Today would be especially tense: it was the opening night of the round-trip tour! Bundled up in their winter attire, the three took their usual shortcut through the ankle-deep snow, continuing their classic films argument along the way.

"It was not!" argued Alvin, "The Jaws movies are always made five years apart from each other! The first one was in 1973, then Jaws II was made in 1978, so the third one was made in 1982!" Simon sighed, not surprised by his elder brother's absence of mathematic skills and lack of cimematic knowledge, "By that assumption, that would mean that the third Jaws was made in 1983, not 1982. 1978 plus five years would be 1983 - you did the math wrong. But it wouldn't matter because the FIRST Jaws was made in 1975, not 1973. Hence your theory is incorrect anyway."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, blah, blah, blah!" mocked Alvin, "I still think you're wrong. Jaws: The Revenge was made in 1982."

"No, _you're_ wrong. It was in 1987...and considering the fact that it did tragically in the box office, I haven't a clue how you even knew that movie existed in the first place!"

"Well then you underestimate my knowledge of movie history, which I happen to have a lot of!" Boasted Alvin as the three drew closer to the school grounds.

"Yeah...right," replied Simon sarcastically, "you keep telling yourself that..."

"Can't you guys stop fighting already?" whimpered Theodore, who'd been silent throughout the entire walk, "you guys never agree with anything anyway! I-i don't even know how you two began arguing!"

The blue-clad Chipmunk rolled his eyes in annoyance, "I don't agree on arguing over unimportant things normally, but it seems to be Alvin's new hobby these days, though he's terrible at it."

"No I'm not!" Alvin protested.

"Yes, you are. If you're going to debate over something, you should at least know your facts first."

"I do know my facts! You're just always-, " suddenly, Alvin was interrupted by a series of sneezes: "-A! A-! A-! ACHOO! ...ACHOO! ACH-OO!"

"Cover your mouth, Alvin!" lectured Simon.

"Sorry... I'm not sure what I-I...I! ACH-OO! ...ACHOO!"

"Alvin...are you okay?" asked Theodore, disquieted.

"Yeah, I'm fine... I'm ju-...just...a! ACHOO!"

This pattern of sneezes continued for another minute or so until it slowly came to a stop as the boys neared the school grounds. He gave one final sneeze.

"Bless you, Alvin." said Simon flatly, agitation evident in his voice, "...for the twentieth time."

"Alvin, you've been sneezing a lot this morning. Are you sure you're not allergic to something?" Asked Theodore, concerned. Alvin sniffled a little, "Of course not! I'm not allergic to anything! It's probably just...eh...dust."

As the boys went through the main entrance of the school, Simon examined his red-clad brother's face carefully while the three of them took off their winter coats, "Hmm...Are you sure you're feeling well today? You look rather pale..."

"I'm fine, Simon." sneered Alvin defiantly as he removed his snowgloves, "nothing's wrong with me."

"Are you sure? Because if you're sick, it'll affect the concert tonight-"

"I'm aware, for the last time!" He interjected defensively. What a nightmare of a thought: being sick just on the debut night of their big tour! The trio had been anxiously awaiting this opening for months! There was no time to be sick! Besides, rockstars don't get sick in Alvin's eyes.

Alvin pretended to look down at his watch, "Whoops. Look at the time...I gotta go to english or I'll be late. See ya!"

With that, Alvin took off toward his homeroom class. This was odd; normally Alvin never cared about being late to his classes. In fact, he often celebrated the fact that he'd never actually been on time to any of his subjects...and since when was he ever aware of time?

"U-uh...see ya, A-alvin..." called Theodore hesitantly. He turned to Simon, an obvious display of worry in his eyes, "I-i don't think Alvin's telling the truth... d-do you think he might be sick, Simon?"

"I certainly hope not, " replied the bespectacled chipmunk solemnly, "If he's sick...we won't be able to perform tonight."


	2. Chapter 2

**Note from BlytheHasFreckles:**

**Hey guys! Listen, I'm so sorry for the hugely delayed update. Things are hectic around here with college applying, work, the holidays, play rehearsals, and school... Time slips away from me so easily these days much worse than they used to! **

**Also, for all of your reading my other stories: I intend on updating them within this week hopefully, so bear with me! Again, I'm so sorry for the delay! You have full permission to be frustrated with me!**

**Anyway, hope you enjoy this next chapter! Happy Holidays!**

**-Blythe**

* * *

**Chapter 2.**

"Alvin..."

No response.

"Psst..._Alvin_!"

Murmuring, yet still nothing.

"Alvin, don't make me yell!"

Still nothing.

The lead Chipette was used to Alvin's antics, but her temper was much too short today to deal with his shenanigans. Without warning, she jerked her foot into the leg of his desk, startling the chipmunk awake.

"Mfftmmmp...what?!" whined Alvin, opening his eyelids slowly and adjusting his vision to the brightness of the ceiling lights. He narrowed his eyes at his female counterpart, who was unsurprisingly filing her newly manicured nails. She stared back pointedly at him.

"Why are you doing this to yourself?" she asked, "Mr. Lerner said you'd have to stay after school for detention if he caught you sleeping in his class again! You can't do that today, remember? We have to prepare for the concert tonight!"

"Oh please," sneered the chipmunk, straightening his posture. He lowered the volume of his voice, "You don't believe that, do you?"

"Why wouldn't I? You serve detention all the time!"

"Yeah, but not in this class! Mr. Lerner just said that to scare me. Besides, he knows what a handful I could be when I'm in dete-e-ehh-" suddenly, Alvin was poised for a sneeze. He took immediate action, trying to hold his nose and force it away. But it powered through all restraint and tickled his sinus, causing him to take in a sharp breath. Jerking his body forward, he let loose a loud sneeze without warning, "ACHOO!"

"EW!" shrieked Brittany, immediately moving away from him, "What do you think you're doing?!"

"Mmmph? What do you mean?" sniffed Alvin as he recovered. Brittany was frozen in place, her face twisted into a disgusted grimace and her body was as far away from him as it allowed her to be within the confines of her desk.

"You just sneezed on me!"

"Oh. Whoops."

"'_Whoops?_' You owe me an apology! That's disgusting!"

"It's not like I can control i-i-iiii-ACHOO! ACHOO!"

"EEK! _Cover your mout_h for gosh sakes!" demanded Brittany, cringing each time Alvin let out a whirlwind of a sneeze.

The cycle continued for about a minute, then finally halted as Alvin pulled his handkerchief out of his coat pocket. The red-clad chipmunk sniffled a bit, steadily regaining his composure as he peered back at his infuriated counterpart. She looked mortified, slowly lowering her arms to her sides. By the looks of it, Alvin knew he was in for it. He knew how squeamish Brittany was on a regular basis and today would be no different. In his head, he planned out everything she would say to him.

"Are you trying to jeopardize my health?! I can't believe you! Don't you know how rude it is to SNEEZE on people?! I mean, you couldn't even cover your mouth with your sleeve or your arm?! What if I get sick, hm?! What if the lead Chipette - and audience favorite - can't perform at the kick-off of our tour?! Gosh! How could you get sick on us like this?! What about Simon and Theodore, huh?! What about the band?!"

Brittany stopped lecturing for a moment only to realize that her audience wasn't listening to her rant. His face was flat on the desk.

"Alvin. _Alvin!_ I'm talking to you! Alvin!"

_"Whaaaaat?"_

"Wake up!"

"I don't _wanna_." resisted Alvin wearily.

Brittany was not going to tolerate this. Without a second thought, she already knew what would wake him up. Stretching her arms, she reached over and snatched up his cap and then held it away from him with her other arm. This was an immediate success; following her stealthy move, Alvin sprung awake and shot her a nasty glare.

"Give. Back. The cap." he commanded, his voice entering a lower register than normal.

"Not until you learn to_ listen_ to people when they're talking to you!"

"Give it back!"

"No! This is what you get for-"

"If you don't give it back, I _swear_ I'll-!"

No sooner did Alvin stand up to grab his hat when a booming voice commanded the attention of the room, causing both of them to quit their fighting for a moment.

"Mister Seville! Miss Miller!" barked Mr. Lerner, "Would you like to take a moment from your bickering to explain why you're rudely interrupting my class?"

"She stole my cap!" blamed Alvin, pointing an accusing finger at Brittany.

Brittany countered his accusation immediately, "Yeah?! W-well _HE_ was being rude! And he _SNEEZED_ on me-!"

"Both of you take a seat. _Now._"

The two looked at each other, then back at Mr. Lerner, lowering themselves back into their seats.

"Yes, Mr. Lerner," mumbled Brittany and Alvin, keeping all eye contact away from their teacher. As Brittany lowered her arms, Alvin reached over and took his cap from her. Neither of them made a sound.

"I don't want to hear another word out of either of you, understand? Not _one_. If I hear anything else from over there, I will see you both after class." warned Mr. Lerner.

With that, the teacher cleared his throat, returning to the day's lesson. Neither Brittany nor Alvin stirred, but they made angry faces at each other until the bell rang. Gathering up their folders and notebooks, the two exited the room and went their separate ways without another word.

* * *

Gym class was Brittany's least favorite part of the day as one would expect. What could possibly be worse than the dank smell of the girls locker room, playing pointless sports and getting sweaty over something as trivial as Frisbee The Chipette didn't know what was worse: wearing the ugly gray and black gym uniform or risking breaking another one of her artfully crafted fingernails.

The whole experience of gym class nauseated Brittany; gym class was nothing like real sports or cheerleading. She always ended up in the gym class with band geeks and nerds who had no athletic abilities, therefore there was no one to actually challenge her athletically. Even though she preferred being sparkling clean, there was nothing like a little competition every now and then to prove that she was not only prettier than the opposing team, but also far more skilled in the category of sports. But since no one could even manage to run for two minutes without getting winded, it made it very hard for Brittany to enjoy herself.

The only thing that made each experience less miserable was that Jeanette was also in the class to keep her company.

As Brittany entered the gym, she met with her bespectacled sister who was leaning up against the wall, her nose buried in a Jane Austin novel as it always was. _Sense and Sensibility_, read the front cover's title in elegant cursive.

"Jeanette," sighed Brittany, "do you think I could get away with skipping this class?"

"Why would you do that?" asked Jeanette, hardly looking up from the novel, "I thought you liked playing sports!"

"Yeah, but gym is so stupid! We don't even play real sports! Besides, nobody in our class can even catch or throw!"

"Mhm..." Jeanette mumbled, concentrating more on reading than speaking to her whining sister. Brittany leaned her back against the matted wall.

"I'm tired. I'd rather just go lay down."

"Brittany, you say that every time we have gym."

But this time, the eldest Chipette wasn't exaggerating. She felt as though her body weighed an extra hundred pounds; as if her arms and legs were filled with sand. Surely she hadn't woken up feeling like this! She'd gotten plenty of sleep and ate breakfast, so it wasn't another case of exhaustion... And it surely couldn't have been brought on due to stress! Every time she had a show to do, usually her day was full of excitement and energy rather than lethargy! Fatigued, she laid against the wall, her body suddenly overcome by aching sinuses.

"I don't feel well, Jeanette..." moaned Brittany, closing her eyes to the light coming through the gymnasium windows, "I think I want to sit this one out."

"You can't. You told Coach Lee that you wanted to sit out for the last three classes, remember?"

"Yeah, but...but I'm tired..."

From the north end of the gym, a whistle sounded and called attention from everyone in the room. Coach Lee, a man of tall, intimidating stature stepped out of his office.

"Alright! Line up!" he bellowed. Within an instant, the entire room of 4th graders were standing at attention up against the wall. Brittany took a bit longer to get up, lazily leaning over and backing up against the wall until she was on her feet. This was a bad idea - not only did this make Brittany feel worse, but it also dizzied her until she could barely stand still.

"Brittany Miller," began Coach Lee, towering over the Chipette as if she was no more than a stepping stool, "is there a reason why you're out of line?"

Amid her dizziness, Brittany looked down the row of other 4th graders who were all in a straight shoulder-to-shoulder line against the wall. She noticed how far apart she stood away from the rest. Jeanette furrowed her brow, perplexed by her sister's unusual behavior.

"Coach, I-i'm not feeling so good," complained Brittany, "I'm feeling really dizzy and sluggish. C-can I just sit this one out?"

"Absolutely not." barked Coach Lee, "You've asked to sit out for the past four classes! If you do not participate this time around, I'm giving you a zero for this class!"

Brittany's face began to feel warm as a sea of mocking 'oohs" and 'ahs' from her classmates echoed through the gym. She gulped hard, trying to swallow the lump in her throat. Trying again, she took in a deep breath.

"Coach Lee, I-"

"Don't feel well, yeah yeah. Tell ya what, Miller... If I'm impressed by your participation this class period, I'll let you go to the nurse ten minutes early. Deal?"

Brittany tossed the idea around in her head, considering the option. It took a moment for her to realize that this deal of his was most likely the only deal he was going to give her. _ "Maybe it wouldn't be so bad," _she thought_, "I mean, it's only forty-five minutes! I can do it, right? I'm probably just nervous about tonight!"_

The only choice she had was to bite the bullet and deal with forty-five minutes of meaningless indoor sports. After all, her punishment was somewhat fair - this was what she got for sitting out during so many classes. Shaming herself quietly, she nodded.

"Okay..." she squeaked softly.

Jeanette watched from a few feet away, noticing her sister's submissive behavior. How very unlike Brittany to just give in! The usual Brittany would've accepted the challenge with pride. After all, nothing woke up the pink Chipette quite as much as a new proposition! This time was different, though... Brittany was in a sultry daze.

As Coach Lee backed away, Jeanette filled his place in front of her sister. Examining her pallor expression, the bespectacled Chipette placed her hand against Brittany's forehead and cheeks to detect a high temperature.

"Brittany... you're burning up! A-are you sure you don't want me to talk to Coach Lee for you? I could escort you to the nurse i-if you feel light-headed..?"

"No, I'll be alright." refused the elder Chipette, "I've got to do this."

* * *

Today's sport was basketball - one of Brittany's favorites. The only problem was that she wasn't in the game at all. Half an hour had passed in gym when Jeanette noticed another change in Brittany: not only was her paleness worrisome, but from a distance she seemed to sway a bit. After being pushed by several classmates, she seemed to be unable to fight back, going in whatever direction she was being shoved toward. A few times, she would even lose her balance and fall over!

"Brittany! What's wrong with you? Are you okay?" asked Jeanette, holding her sister by the shoulders.

Brittany's response was slow and lazy, coming from her lips in an incoherant slur, "I don't...I don't know...I-i'm...I feel a little..."

Before Jeanette heard the end of her sentence, Brittany was out cold, falling into her like a lifeless ragdoll and bringing the purple Chipette to her knees.

"Coach Lee! Coach Lee!" called Jeanette frantically, "Something's wrong with Brittany!"

* * *

**Thanks for reading! Updates will come soon! **


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